Thursday, September 24, 2009

Sex

* Warning to those who know me who may not want to know sordid details of my sex life
(Ahem, Court - that would be you)

As of nearly 2 weeks ago now, my OB has given me the go-ahead to have 'relations'. I wasn't about to though unless I was assured I would not get pregnant. No pill, no condom and no spermicide could assure that so I waited until it was safe to get THE SHOT. LOL
I swore before my first pregnancy when I thought that Depo Provera had made me infertile that I would never take THE SHOT again. I lied.
But now I have a dilemma.
I don't want sex.
Not in the morning, not in the afternoon and not at night.
I don't want it for me, I don't want it for him. I just don't want it and no amount of 'stimulation' changes my feelings on it.
I have come up with several reasons as to why.

- Maybe being a mom of two, having spitup and poop up to my elbows on a daily basis just doesn't make me feel sexy.
- Maybe its because it has to be a 'quickie' and I can't truly enjoy it
- Maybe its because the girls are right here and at any moment they'll wake up
- Maybe its because it has to be planned for when the girls are sleeping
- Maybe its because when the girls are sleeping is when I want to write and I don't like being robbed of my writing time.
- Maybe its because of the depo shot. It is said to lower the libido
- Or maybe, just maybe its because I just don't feel physical toward my husband any more.

I much prefer Ol' reliable - My hand
I feel awful actually. He has been very sweet. Very helpful with the house and with the girls since his return from Mexico. In all rights he deserves sex. I just don't want to be the one to give it to him.
Okay that sounds bad. It's not like I want him to go out and cheat on me. Nor do I want an open marriage where he brings someone home when he's in the mood. I guess I just don't want to be the one he's constantly rubbing up against, feeling up, and saying 'do you wanna?'to. Cuz NO I don't wanna. But it's hard to tell someone that over and over and over again.
((sigh))
I need an excuse. A good excuse. But I can't come up with one.
((deeper sigh))

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Twilight Obsessed and Fiction Dependent

So I think I should talk about Twilight. Okay, it has been almost 5 years since the first book was released, more than a year since the first movie and nearly 6 months since I was introduced to the Saga. Part of me wishes I never had been. I have become a hormonal teenager all over again. Robert Pattinson does not exist. No, he is Edward Cullen a deep mysterious vampire that I cannot help but swoon over.
Uh HELLO! I’m nearly 25 years old. This is so not normal!
In fact, I buy posters and teeny bopper magazines with his photos in them and give them to my 16 year old sister to hold onto for me for when I need to get my visual fix. What is wrong with me?
Onto more fiction, only this time my own. I cannot go into detail (as I mentioned before as to why) but I think I am falling in love with my own character. (We’ll call him S) S is everything my husband isn’t and so much more, not to mention he’s not human. But that’s beside the point.
I try to justify my obsession with fictional characters but all I can come up with is that my husband sucks so bad that I have to invent who I actually would have liked to have married.
Okay, random rant over.
One last thing though. I want to know why, in the span of one month my hits counter quadrupled. What did I do? Cuz it certainly wasn’t my avid posting skills.
Anyone have a guess?

Updated Pix of Buzzy











Updates Pix of Lessy




Friday, September 11, 2009

BIP (Book In Progress) Update

As I have written before, I am currently writing a book. I am now close if not half way done with it. I hope to be writing query letters to publishers and sending out portions of my manuscripts by February 2010. I don't have any expectations. I can't imagine that with all the incredibly creative minds out there that mine would be the next book to be chosen to be published but I will never know until I try.

I know I haven't really described what I am writing about but that is for the safety of my ideas. I don't want anyone going and stealing them. (not that I'm tooting my own horn and saying they're fabulous -- just saying IN CASE someone think they're fabulous I want to make sure they know they are my original ideas) I will say however that the genre is fantasy fiction and if possible I would like to break the tale up into three books. I have ideas for their titles. One set of ideas I cannot divulge as it would give away some of my 'original ideas' that I don't want stolen, but another set of ideas are THE SNAKE, THE CROSS AND THORNS.

In other news, Buzzy and Lessy are doing fabulously although I think Buzzy is starting to go through the terrible ones. She pitches fits at everything. Oh well. What's a mom to do?

Myturo is coming home from Mexico tomorrow. Whoop-dee-friggin-doo. **Actually I am kinda excited because that means someone can watch Buzzy and Lessy for me a couple hours a day while I get some writing done.
((sigh))
And that's all for now folks. Until the next spare second I have.
TTFN

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Long Time No Talk Post

Things in this household have been rocky to say the least. Hence why it has been nearly 2 weeks since I posted last.

Ahem, speaking of: Meghan, I still need your addy. Please send it to me so I can send you your prize.

Anyway here are 10 things that have happened since I last posted.

1. Lessy's chord fell off. Woohoo!!

2. Lessy had her 2 week ante natal appointment. All well, and she's gained a whole stinkin' pound since birth! My little porker!

3. Buzzy DIDN'T have her 12 month well check and shots because as soon as the pedi was done with Lessy a generator somewhere close by in the city blew and the clinic lost all power. Neat! There was no way I was gonna let them give her shots when she was already freaked out and in the dark even less.

4. I had my 2 week post partum appointment, 3 weeks and 3 days later. LOL. My doc wondered the same thing as me. Did they actually cut me open or did they remove her by osmosis?

5. Myturo and I had an ENORMOUS, GIGANTUAN fight. We are on some very interesting terms right now.
* And he is going to Mexico the 5th of September so I am hoping he sorts his shit stuff out and either becomes a man before he comes back or decides to stay.

6. My sis took my mom and I to Beaverton, Oregon where we ate at an authentic Japanese restaurant, shopped in an authentic Japanese store and bought some yummy other authentic Japanese snackies.

7. I finished pre-editing the first 15o pages of my BIP with the help of my co-author and editor, my sister. Wahoo! Onto new material!

8. My mom started reading my BIP and says she likes/loves it! Wahooo!

9. Lessy has some seriously bad gas and so last night I tried to supplement her with some pre-digested formula called Nutramagin. (Can we all say eew?) She wasn't having that. She prefers her gas inducing good tasting (Nasty smelling) Similac.

10. I have posted a blog, today, right here and now. LOL

And for now that is all I got as my youngest is grunting and groaning with gas, about to wake my oldest. So toodles for now!
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