Wednesday, March 24, 2010

I'M BROKEN

As I stated in my previous post, I was going to try something different with food. I have realized that when I am eating WITH people, I tend to eat less. I am not sure if it is out of embarrassment, obligation or being accountable, but when I am alone I feel the need to snack and eat and snack and eat some more. So, I thought I would try something. Before I even mention what I tried, just know I barely made it half a day before I FAILED miserably. My plan?

If I was to be eating solo for breakfast or lunch, I would drink a SlimFast and if I were eating solo for dinner I would have a Lean Cuisine. Well, I did okay at first. SlimFast for breakfast. 100 cal snack (as directed on the SlimFast plan) then SlimFast for lunch and another 100 cal snack to follow (as directed on the SlimFast plan) but then my mom and my sister went and got chicken fried rice. A HUGE weakness of mine, and I failed. I was already cranky and irritable from lack of calories, caffeine and general nutrients so when they offered me the rice, it was like hay day in my mouth. LOL Not to mention the SlimFast shakes are waaaayyyyy too sweet. I nearly went bonkers from feeling sit jittery.

But today's calories don't amount to much regardless.

2 Slim Fast shakes: 380
2 100 cal snacks: 200
Chicken fried rice: Not sure if I ate approximately 2 or 3 cups but somewhere between 440 cals and 660 cals
1/3 cup chicken noodle soup: 40 cals

So a max of 1280? Yeah, it will definitely help with the weekly add up considering yesterday and the day before were ashambles.

I walked today and I have come to the conclusion that I am officially broken. I walked 1 mile at a very slow pace, pushing my tandem stroller and when I was done I felt as though I was being pierced through each heal by a 2x4 solid steal stake. It hurt sooooo bad. Then tonight I went to toddler gymnastics with Buzzy and we had a new (GOOD) teacher this time and he worked us Mama's out. He not only had the kiddos running around and doing all their stuff but the Mama's were workin our buns off too.

This is completely off topic but what is currently on my mind. I'm a pushover. No truly. I am a pushover. My (ex) husband is native Mexican. He speaks English and understands English well enough but when he can . . . and I mean WHENEVER he can he pawns off anything that requires use of the English language onto me. For example: He is currently looking for a second job. He works in the restaurant business. Apparently a friend (who speaks less English than he does) told him about a job opening and told him to go to www.norastrum.com. Without hesitation he calls me and tells me to fill out an application for him. Yeah, you read right. He TELLS ME. No asking. He doesn't know the meaning of courtesy or manners and it is of no relevance that we are separated. He feels I still owe it to him. In any case, being the dumbass doormat that I am I look up www.norastrum.com. No such site. Then I mentally smack my own forehead. He meant www.nordstrom.com. DUH!! I should have known. In any case, he assumes that because I live 45 miles away from him and the girls are asleep and I am texting him, that I have nothing else to do and therefore he needs to delegate something to me to keep me busy. I am being mildly rebellious though. He keeps on texting me asking me if I am done, but I haven't even begun. Instead I am venting to you guys. I really should just tell him to take a frickin' computer course and learn English for gosh darn sake and grow up. I'm not his Mama and I'm barely his wife. ((sigh)) and yet the minute this post is done, I will click a new window and fill out the stupid app for him. Can someone hit me hard? Please?

In other news, I am still planning on getting rid of the scale in April. Really scary stuff right there but I find I am completely OCD when it comes to weighing and I need a break. No more numbers. No more obsessing. Just staying on plan, staying on track and exercising as much as my broken body will allow.

Tomorrow night I am going to a Jewelry party where there will inevitably be a bunch of snacky foods, like I mentioned about Bunco in THIS post a couple months back. I never truly commented on how I did at Bunco but I didn't eat a single thing. All I had was a diet root beer. I hope I am able to abstain as well tomorrow. I will make sure I eat my allotted calories before the party so I know that anything I consume must have 0 calorie content. Like a diet soda.

On the very last note of this post, this last week I realized another reason why I probably lost a large number. The weeks prior I had a diet soda at around 9pm-10pm every night including the night before weigh in. Last week I didn't have barely any sodas after 5pm which I imagine contributed to my 5lb loss. So I am attempting this again, although it is difficult.

DIET CHERRY COKE IS BETTER THAN CRACK!! <-- Okay I wouldn't actually know that from experience but mmm mmm mmm I love me some Diet Cherry Coke.

The Fat Chick

5 comments :

  1. Wow! What is up with these helpless men that expect the exes to keep doing stuff for them after they split? Maybe you could enroll him in english & computer classes while you're at it. :)

    I always have a hard time attending "home parties" without going overboard on the goodies. These days I try to arrive just before time for it to start & leave fairly quickly when its over... since most of the eating happens before/after the party this works pretty well. Good luck at the party! I'm sure you'll do great!!

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  2. Diet cherry coke-you are right it is like a dessert.

    Secretia

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  3. I love diet cherry coke! Your right giving up soda at night is so hard!! I will try that before my next weigh in. As for the ex...sorry dear. i know that it is hard. And yes you have doormat sysdrome that alot of us have. Hopefully as your confidance grows your dorrmat will shrink...

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  4. Sounds like your foot problem could be planters fasciitis. which is basically when you pull the muscle in your heel - try to rest it and it should get better (yea I know we all walk so it's hard... )

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  5. Oh girl...you deserve better. I would fill the app out for him, but I would put bogus info in there, that would make for a fun interview..you think.

    Ps: Im having a giveaway, check it out

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