Thursday, July 15, 2010

IT'S PATHETIC THAT I BLOG SO MUCH . . . ISN'T IT?

The other title I was thinking this post should have was, MORE THAN YOU EVER WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT MY BODY... but I figured the other suited it better considering the overall context.

** MAY DAY MAY DAY! THIS IS A WARNING. ****WARNING**** IF YOU PROCEED TO READ THE FOLLOWING CONTENT YOU WILL BE INUNDATED ABOUT MY FLABBY ARMS, BOWEL MOVEMENT AND . . . DUN DUN DUN DUN . . . MY PERIOD** I WARNED YOU! YOU CANNOT SAY YOU HAVEN’T BEEN WARNED BECAUSE YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!**

When I am eating well, I am more in tune to my body and how it responds to things as well as if it is acting normal or – well – abnormally.

Lately, probably do to my craptastic eating, I have had more headaches, more stomach aches, more time on the porcelain throne and more time feeling lazy than I have in a very long time. Amazingly enough, though, I have been doing my BOX DIET for 2 (count em 1 & 2) days and already my stomach aches are non-existent, which means less trips to the porcelain throne. UH, WELL that’s a lie. I actually make MORE trips but instead of sitting there for hours on end hoping whatever is squeezing the life out of my body will exit via my intestines, instead I pee and am done. I haven’t had a headache either. Wait, that’s a lie too. I had a caffeine withdrawal headache yesterday which made me think to myself. I can indulge in one cup of caffeinated beverage a day to ward off the headaches. (MIND YOU ANY HEADACHE I GET TURNS INTO RAGING MIGRAINES SO, WARDING THEM OFF IS BETTER THAN TRYING TO ENDURE THROUGH THE WITHDRAWAL – I do have two small children who need my attention and when I have a migraine I become incapacitated. Ie: curled into fetal position in the corner of a dark room, moaning and sucking my thumb – okay maybe not that but seriously. Life stops moving forward for me when I have a migraine) ANYWAAAAAYYYY… So, today I had my one caffeinated beverage and I still have upwards of 1000 calories I am able to eat for the rest of the day. Mind you, I will probably only eat 500-700 more. I am not being as active as I could be so less calories isn’t gonna kill me.

NEXT – Breezy is still in formula and will be for approximately 2 more weeks. (Until she is 1) I don’t know what my right upper arm flab is gonna do without shaking a baby bottle 4-6 times every 24 hours to get the powder to go down. It will be left without any jiggling, wiggling or vigorous flapping. How awful!

NEXT – Breezy’s birth brought on an onslaught of LONG ASS FRICKIN PERIODS for me starting when she was around 4 months old. For the last 8 months I have endured HEAVY periods lasting anywhere from 15-36 days long. But, I am excited to announce that my blood letting seems to have subsided. I started my cycle 6 days ago and yesterday it waned and disappeared completely hopefully never to return – er – until next month anyway.

NEXT - Today my daughters have decided to ambush me. When one isn’t screaming cuz she wants to chew (and inevitably swallow) gum at 2 years old, the other is playing in the toilet. When one is defiantly drinking her baba but refusing to nap, the other is rebelliously NOT DRINKING HER BABA AND ATTEMPTING TO NOSE DIVE OFF HER BED. When one is screaming because the other has a purse and she doesn’t, the one with the purse is attacking my head in an attempt to confiscate all the little butterfly clips in my hair and lastly, when one is jumping on the couch even though I explicitly told her not to, the other is scavenging WHERE? Once again . . . in the toilet. CAN WE ALL SAY EEW? Or any other expletive that suits your fancy. I for one said, “No no Breezy we do not play in the toilet!” while inside my brain I was contemplating washing her mouth out with soap, but NOOOOOO not for punishment. Just to sanitize her mouth in case her chubby grubby fingers made their way in there before I caught her. Oh the joys of motherhood. And I hear it only gets better!!

OH BOY I CAN'T WAIT!!

PS - It's pathetic that I have so much free time to write/blog isn't it? I swear I don't ignore my children. They are perfectly conent playing in their ginormous playhouse with their millions of different fake foods and array of dollies. I am blessed . . . and bored. CAN I PLAY? LOL

PPS - Emelia over at [238] and Shrinking is doing her FIRST GIVEAWAY - A Biggest Loser Family Cookbook. Head on over and show her some love and click HERE if you would also like to enter to win the cookbook!

The Fat Chick

5 comments :

  1. Frequent blogging...I love it!

    So...there isn't a "follow me" thing for wordpress I guess. Jerks. But I did add a "Subscribe" button so you can get notification via email when I blog.

    And might I add that I, too, was a frequent visitor of the Porcelain Throne for years. It never dawned on me that the crap that I was shoving into my body hand over fist could have been causing it. Duh. Now that I'm eating better, I rarely feel like an alien is trying to explode from my intestinal tract. Weird.

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  2. I left you a Versatile award on my blog. Please check it out and pass it on. It's on my Everyday Life's Issues blog.

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  3. I've been reading your blog since January and have been routing for you through all your ups and downs and through your issue with your ex. You write REAL life, which isn't only about eating and dieting and exercising but also the things that distract us from doing good for ourselves. You write the whole picture, and sometimes that means falling off the wagon (and getting right back on!)

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  4. Hi, I'm new to your blog, and I like it. I like the honesty. :) I hope things get a little less hectic for you! :) Take care (I'm gonna follow you now so I can read more. :))

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  5. Oh God I know about the stomach and headache issues! You are not allow in that department!

    Have your cofee and drink it too!! :D
    It's actually a good thing to have caffeine, especially just before exercising (walking, treadmill, biking, etc.) or when you're first getting up because it helps get your metabolism into high gear. Yep! I had a personal trainer at the gym several years ago who gave me that tip!

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