... you should have known what was coming, too, which only makes me wonder why you continue to allow him to dictate your life.
Why can't he come and see his daughters in a place that is mid-point or neutral and you don't have to drive a long time? A park or a mall? Where you'd have options? Or you could take a boxed lunch for yourself and the girls...so if he sayd "let's eat crap" you can say, "Go ahead. Eat crap. We have good food."
Truly, the only reason why I allow him any control over anything in my life is fear. I have an insane (and probably irrational?) but ever present fear of what he is capable of doing to me and my girls. He is known to go to any means to get what he wants. Which includes by illegal means. And while is illegal activities thus far have been small time, i don't want to test how far he will go. This instills more fear in me. When a person isn't scared of the law and is willing to surpass it to achieve his goal the fear factor/the intimidation factor and the dilemma of control comes into play. If I don't give him some control, to what extent will he go to take it anyway. And when I mean control, I mean my girls. He knows my world revolves around them. And he knows my world would disintegrate without them.
As for why he 'can't' come see us... Well, he can. He would have to ride a bus (because he had his car voluntarily repossessed) across state borders and I've suggested it. He became furious that I (who has a car) would assume to expect him to take a bus when I could easily just drive to him. He is a very selfish man in many ways.
I don't know if I have mentioned it before but I get food stamps. He makes a decent amount of money every 2 weeks in his paycheck. Because he doesn't live with us I am not legally allowed to share my food with him. Yet he is always telling me how he needs food and that I am selfish for not buying his food with the government money. That I don't think about his needs and his health. This is just an example of his thought process.
Anyway, I have to wrap this up but what I do is out of fear. I have constant fear. There isn't a night I don't go to sleep and wonder if I haven't pushed him too far and fall asleep terrified of what he (or someone he knows) might do to me, my family or my girls.
Here I was going to write about shopping day this coming Tuesday. But I'm late getting ready for a doctor appointment so instead I will pose a question.
What staples (absolutely necessary grocery items) do you keep in your house on your healthy living journey? Snacks? Meals? Condiments? Help a girl out for my upcoming shopping trip!
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