Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Anxiety Will Always Lead You Astray

In my most recent post Mallwalker from Getting Healthy gave me these two pieces of advice, "Don't worry..." and "Worry doesn't get you anywhere." The rest of what she said was important as well but these two pieces of advice resounded with me. Why? Because worry and anxiety have been my leading causes of stress and emotional eating for thee longest time.

Today was a product of that anxiety. Details withheld I am going through a very trying time in my life. Some of you may know to what I refer and others may not. Those details are not important. What is important is that I immediately turn to food when times get difficult. I overate and had a mini binge today. I hadn't binged for 3 days which is a current record and I am proud of that record. I plan to beat it with day one starting again tomorrow. 

As I said we would, my family and I went to the zoo today. Beforehand my breakfast was the norm. Two pieces of blueberry toast and a cup of coffee with cream. 

At the zoo things started out well. We had lunch. The calories in their grilled cheese sandwich was fairly low and so I chose that for lunch. That is when things started popping into my mind. Current events. Past events. Events with question marks left unanswered. I ate my grilled cheese and the chips that came with it. Then I nibbled on a leftover hotdog and some french fries. After lunch I shared an elephant ear with 4 people. Dinner was Chipotle Mexican Grill. I had never eaten there before. I chose badly. I had a steak barbacoa burrito (I should have just had the bowl -sans tortilla-) The burrito has steak, cilantro-lime rice, black beans, sour cream, guacamole and pico. After I finished that I also ate a little left over rice, a few bites of chicken and some tortilla chips. My mini binge came once we had arrived home and there were fresh oatmeal cookies staring me in the face. I had 4 1/2. I call this a mini binge because normally I would have eaten 10 or 15 or even the entire plate (like 25 cookies) I would have eaten a total of 5 cookies if someone hadn't plucked the fifth one out of my hand half way through and popped it in their own mouth.

Needless to say, I don't have a good grasp on my calorie count. I know I walked for a solid 3 hours up and down hills, over uneven terrain and sometimes pushing or pulling weight greater than 50lbs. Other times carrying weight of over 30lbs. I can say my butt hurts. My thighs hurt. My shoulders and my chest hurt - in a good way of course. 

Here are my three favorite photos from today's trip.

Praying (actually she was sleeping) baboon

New baby elephants

Holding hands

On another topic, I think I may have an umbilical hernia. I need to go have it checked out. Not fun! I will keep you updated on that. 

And so I leave you with this:
(I am not a bible thumper, but do consider myself a Christian woman. If Christianity is not your cup of tea I understand and do not look to force my beliefs on anyone. I happen to find great comfort in the following verses and hope that you can respect that)

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7).

“Then Jesus said to his disciples: ‘Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?’” (Luke 12:22-26, NIV)

1 comment :

  1. Is that the Oregon Zoo? I want to say that I thought you were from Vancouver or somewhere nearby....

    Anyway, I went to the Oregon Zoo a couple weeks ago and walked, and walked, and walked. It was a great time and the animals were so active!

    Keep up the walking and doing what you can to be healthy, and try to not stress too much.


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