I gorged on Easter candy today.
I plan to start a renewed plan tomorrow.
I am not at all confident that I will succeed.
I am confident that I will never stop trying.
I am ashamed that my weight has risen above 300 once again.
I am mad that I lost control that much for that amount of time.
I am going to do within my physical capability to control what I put in my mouth.
Psychology, reverse psychology, counting, humming, crying, screaming . . . it will all come into play.
AND immediately, I will be tested.
Tomorrow is Monday.
I have to spend 5 hours every Monday with the girls' dad.
I need to pray and ask God to help me. I need to pray that he allows me to be in control of my actions. I need to pray I don't feel the need to drown my emotions. I need to pray that at the very least, he gives me a tummy bug that makes me feel just nauseous enough that NOTHING sounds appealing. Oh please God . . . help me, especially tomorrow.