Sunday, October 21, 2012

Day 8 Prank Texting, FAIL & Apple Crap

Today is day 8.

Today is Sunday.

On Sundays we go to church and I set my alarm for 8:00.

Then I set a second alarm for 8:15 because my lazy ass does not like to get up at 8:00.

At 7:50 I get a text: CALL ME from a number I do not recognize.

I respond: who is this?

Texter: Emma

Now, I haven't discussed names on my blog except for my daughters' nicknames but here I will divulge that my family has two cats. A 4 year old male named Pierce and an almost 6 month old female named Emma. So you can imagine that in my 1/2 asleep state that the first face that comes to mind is my adorable little kitten at the sight of her name.
But of course, being a kitten I quickly realize that Emma is most likely NOT texting me. 

Me: You have the wrong number

I imagine that will be the end of that and close my eyes to await what is now 8 minutes until my first alarm is to go off. But then my phone bling blings again with another text.

Texter: No its emmah your friend.

Okay, first I thought your name was Emma ('cuz emmah is how they spelled it the second time) and second, I already told you that you have the wrong number so why are you interrupting my precious beauty sleep?

Me: The only Emma I know is my cat. You have the wrong number.

And that's the end of that. Clap hands together and slam eyelids shut to resume sleep.


Eyes pop open and I inhale deeply. Do people not understand how truly early 7:55 (by now) is in the morning and how precious sleep is to a mommy who rarely gets it?

Texter: What


Me: Stop texting me

Within seconds, Texter: Robbs dauter (I am assuming she meant daughter)

By now I am a little incensed. My alarm is going to go off in two minutes. My kids are by some miracle still sleeping while I am dealing with this way too early in the morning prank texting game. Gahh!

Me: Hey! Kid! I'm a 28 year old woman with kids who are sleeping and you're going to wake them up. Stop texting me! NOW!

Texter: Im 39 stop now

Fun and games are now over and this mama is MADD!

Me: If I receive another text I will call the cops. Mmk?

Texter: im mad im calling the cops now

I proceed to call the non-emergent line to report these texts and while I am on the phone with dispatch and then a local police officer I get this.

Texter: Im sorry my sister thought this was her friends number.... im really sorry

Hmm. Do I feel a little bad? Yep. Am I still irritated? You bet!

Texter: im really sorry. please dont call.

A little late sweetie.

10 seconds later. Texter: Im really sorry I thot this was my friend

And somehow the 'wrong number and please don't text me' comments didn't even give you a moment's doubt?

By now I have spoken to the officer who asked me if I would like him to call the number to request that they stop calling. By now I have also deduced by the tone of the texts, the horrific spelling and the emoticons that this is a young teenage girl, likely named Emma whose dad's name is Robb. If I had been a nasty or malicious person I could have totally taken advantage of the situation to get a ton of information out of her. ie: where she lives, how old she is, if she's alone etc. And that is why I did have the cop call the number. Not because I was angry anymore, and not because I wanted her to get in trouble but because if she was my daughter I would want to know that she was carrying on a conversation and unknowingly giving personal information to a total stranger behind a telephone number she 'thinks' is her friend's. It is really scary and sad these days the trouble kids and teens can get into without even any bad intent. Later I received a call from the police officer who assured me that he had talked to the girl and her parents as well and I am glad. I just hope her parents have a good talk with her regarding personal information and acknowledging when someone says you have the wrong number as well as verifying that when  you do text someone, you actually have the correct one in the first place!
Monitor your kids use of their cell phones
Don't give them a cell phone that can call JUST ANYONE

MOVING RIGHT ALONG. There is no need for my first or second alarm because by now it is nearly 8:20 and my daughters are still sleeping peacefully. GAAHHH!! Always on Sundays. Every other day of the week when I have the opportunity to sleep in, they are up at 6:45 or 7:15 but oh no, on the days where I have to be up they sleep and it takes a bull horn to wake them!

So, we are 10 minutes late to church and my Breezy (my youngest) has separation anxiety so I spend at least 3-5 minutes trying to peel her off my behind and shove nudge her into her Sunday school class. I then proceed to 'big kid Sunday school' (haha) and sit down, only to be told by the choir to stand back up to sing. Thankfully when the pastor finally takes the pulpit I am able to close my eyes and fall asleep listen. I do force myself to open my eyes every few minutes though to clear the crazy swirling colors that if I allow them to will turn into dreams and also to make sure I'm not drooling on myself.

Today's sermon was on sacrifice and I LOVED IT! I will have to get into that on another post at another time.

After church we headed to our normal 'after church breakfast place' only to find out that their water heater had died (a horrible tragic death I hope for depriving me of my normal Sunday breakfast) and they were closed until further notice. So we ended up at Jack in the Box. Now, at Jack in the Box there are pros and cons. The pros are that all the menu items have the calorie count right on the menu. The con is that anything that might even suggest to fill you up is no less than 600 calories. So, being that it is nearly noon and I don't plan on eating a second meal until dinner I opt for the 620 calorie grilled breakfast sandwich and coffee with cream. After that we came home to play and rest. Well, my daughters being my daughters wanted a snack even though they had just eaten and I being the kind of lax mom who wants to beef up my super scrawny slender 4 year old and knows my 3 year old won't eat much of whatever she chooses lets them go pick something out. What I didn't count on was suddenly wanting a snack myself. So I chose a 90 calorie Fiber One brownie and that is where it all went downhill. I should have just told myself no, and waited until dinner like I had planned but I let myself have that one stupid brownie and all of a sudden my munchies were on high speed warp drive and my self control plummeted to my hard wood floor and completely absorbed, unobtainable. I found myself eating chips and chocolate (two of my trigger foods) and then when dinner came I ate way too much even though it was mostly healthy. (tex-mex veggies; onion, bell pepper, corn and black beans inside a corn tortilla) OR 6 CORN TORTILLAS IN MY CASE! Yeah, so today was an epic fail. I need to learn to harness and restrain the munchie monster and tell myself no even when I tell my children yes.

I think my new slogan should be JUST SAY NO. Just say no to kids and teens with cell phones. Just say no to snacking! And finally just say no to APPLE! Aside from the fact that Apple is an openly liberal company and a huge supporter of Obama, I am quite appalled by their services and products as of late. I have had my iPhone 3GS for a while. My mom has had hers for a while also. Hers all of a sudden is dying and won't stay on. It cuts off at very inopportune times and needs to be plugged in to actually work properly. Hmmmm. Now that might just be a sign that it needs a new battery, right? Yeah, well the closest Apple store to where we live is nearly 50 miles away and with gas at $4.00/gallon who the hell has that much money to spend when you're going to spend an additional $50-$75 on a phone battery? Now, some people might say, well then you could call Apple and have them send you one. Yeah, not really. If your phone or any Apple product is out of warranty they charge you to talk to them; $75 for full Apple care or $19.99 for a single instance. WTF? I experienced this tonight. Both my daughters are extremely spoiled very blessed and have their own iPads. My youngest dropped hers tonight and I expected that to be no big deal because it has a bullet proof shield nice sturdy cover around it for such occasions. When I picked it up and pressed the home button, the screen looked something like this: Everything was fluorescent with strange lines through it and it really hurt the eyes to look at. So while the apps were visible and Breezy could technically still use it, I needed to find out how to fix it ASAP. So, I called Apple. Now, if you have ever called Apple, you know that they use voice recognition prompts which COMPLETELY PISS ME OFF! 

No matter how many times you repeat the simplest phrase or word the prompt doesn't understand you. 

Me: Customer Service
Prompt: Did you say Account Receivable
Me: No. Customer Service
Prompt: Did you say Technical Service?
Me: No! Customer Service!
Prompt: I'm sorry. I'm having a hard time understanding you. Please tell me again what I can do for you. I understand complete sentences.
Me: I need to speak to customer service about my defective iPad.
Prompt: Okay. Billing. 
Prompt: Okay, MacBook Pro. Do you need technical help?

And so the infuriating circles continue until the prompt apparently exceeds its allotment of guesses and laments: I am sorry I still did not understand what you said. Let me find someone to help you.


Then someone comes on the line and GASP it isn't someone named Adam Smith with an Arabic, Asian or Spanish accent. I can actually understand them, but my IPHONE service is cutting in and out. JUST FLIPPIN' PEACHY. So, we go through the logistics. Device serial number which I have to repeat to him in code 3 times. D is for dog. H is for Heaven. 2 - he interrupts me and says, 'Q?' And I correct him. 'No, 2.' And he repeats, 'Q? Like queen?' and I sigh deeply and say, 'No, 2. Like the number 2.' and we move on and as soon as we finish that he drops the bomb on me that my 90 day warranty is up and I will need to buy a lifetime Apple Care package for $75 or a single instance package for $19.99. I explain to him the circumstances about the colors and the iPad and how far away the closest store is and he attempts to help me but tells me it is most likely a symptom of the drop which will not be covered and would cost $249 to replace or it is a manufacturer's defect and the iPad would be fixed for free. Regardless, I would have to travel the 50 miles and spend bazillions of dollars on gas to fix my daughter's iPad. Then he said, "there is one thing I can try." He directed me to press this and hold that down and then asked me to look for a button that just didn't exist and I was about to get cranky when out of nowhere the color restored itself on the iPad and voila, I was no longer in need of his assistance and to hell with any Apple Care packages. Jeez! Since when does customer service cost money?!

And now, I am going to be super careful and only let Breezy use her iPad when she is sitting down and I will kindly explain to my children, my family and anyone in the world who dares suggest I ever buy another Apple product that there is no way in hell that will ever happen again!

And lastly, I'm tired of people using our front yard as their party/hang out place. Our front yard is quite vast with a four foot high paver wall surrounding it. My mom's bedroom window looks out onto part of it and for the last several nights the teens from around the neighborhood have decided to use that wall and our grass in our front yard as their hang out place. This is just beyond unacceptable to me. Was there a public announcement to the youth of today that it is okay to use other people's property for their personal and social business? I had just about enough of it tonight as these two teens walked along the paver wall and sat cross legged in our front lawn keeping my mom awake with their loud and incessant crazy babble. I opened the blinds and just stared at them until they noticed me and when they did, they promptly jumped off the wall and disappeared into the night. Seriously?! (((shakes head - face palm)))



  1. Tough day! Nice job on keeping it all in perspective, tomorrow should be better (fingers crossed)

  2. You crack me up! well just found your blog and I am totally LOVING it!! Keep up the awesome work excited to be a regular here.
    Your new friend,


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