Friday, October 19, 2012

Day (umm) 6

When you don't avidly keep count of the days they kinda run together. So, I guess today is day 6 of eating well, resisting all evil food and trying my damndest to control the hunger monster in my head. I did very well last night. I ate my meal and my mom made corned beef hash, scrambled eggs, toast and peaches for herself, my sister and my girls. The girls never finish what is served to them whether it is small or enormous portions and the me of a week ago would have eaten anything that was leftover. From both of their plates. In addition to my dinner and then I would have had dessert and a late night snack. I didn't though. It took every friggin ounce of self control, a thousand deep breaths and holding my hands clasped together in my lap not to reach over and shovel the remaining food from their plates into my mouth. I had to close my eyes and distract myself, but I did it! I resisted! Not one morsel entered my lips. And later I felt good about it. I was proud of myself. There was relief that I had overcome the temptation. However, I realized in contrast how deeply affected I would have been if I had given in to the temptation. The relief was significant but the guilt would have been so much more intense. I am not naive though. I am certain that in the days, weeks, months to come and perhaps for the rest of my life I will be faced with the evil food monster's temptations and I will have to choose to resist or give in. I will have to choose relief or guilt. I can only pray it gets easier with time.




2 comments :

  1. Oh man! I know exactly how hard that is to do. Super tough. Awesome feeling being able to turn it down, not right away but when the monster settles down enough for you to get a grip on yourself it's a great feeling of accomplishment. One that I will have to deal with many more times I'm sure

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  2. Thank you, it was indeed a great feeling (afterward -- long afterward haha)

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