Saturday, November 8, 2014

Turning Point

I'd love to be able to say I have a lighthearted post to share today. I'd love to say that but I can't. Instead I will tell you about what happened to me on Monday. It was absolutely insane and shows just how literally anything can happen to anyone at any time. But simultaneously, how God's hand is also in everything. 

I spent the morning doing a Bible study with my gramma. Then Breezy and I baked 3 ingredient peanut butter cookies. Around 3:00 we went to go pick up Sassy from school. It had been a good day thus far. I felt good and happy. Everything was normal. Nothing was amiss. In the car as we drove Breezy asked to listen to a CD so I put one on and we started singing to it. 

That's when my head started swimming and my ears got hot and turned numb and then my hands went numb and my vision began to grow dark. I had come to a stop at a stop light as all this was taking place and in a panic I pulled my cell phone out of my purse and unlocked it shakily. I asked Breezy if she thought she could call 911. She asked me why but I couldn't answer her. I was too preoccupied by the fact that I could no longer keep a grip on my phone and it fell out of my hand. 

I panicked. My vision was growing darker by the millisecond. It felt like two magnets were slowly drawing toward the bridge of my nose from all directions of my head, bringing with them a dark sheath to make me disappear. I felt like I was losing touch with reality and yet also hyperventilating. My heart was pounding out of my chest. In a matter of seconds a million thoughts flashed through my mind from, 'I should try and cross the intersection to get to the doctors office who was across the street' to, 'I'm going to have a stroke or heart attack and die here in front of my baby'. 

Then, without really thinking, (I honestly don't remember the idea coming to me or when I decided to do it) I laid on my horn and signaled as best I could for the woman stopped at the red light beside me to lower her window. She did so, hesitantly at first. I understood. I would have been wary also. I started crying. "I think I'm going to black out! And my daughter..." And this is when God placed his hand on this very special human being in the car next to me to be His/my angel. 

Once she realized what I had said, the woman did not hesitate to stop 2 lanes of heavy traffic to get out of her car to help me. I think I did black out for about 30 seconds or so because the next thing I knew she was standing at my drivers side door, finishing up with 911, smoothing her hand again and again down the back of my head and telling me to lean back and breathe. Just breathe. She asked me if she could call anyone else and it was all I could do to get out for her to call Sassy's school (I told her the name) and to have her stay there with my aunt (who works there) I know the woman was also trying to get me to keep talking because she kept having me repeat what I was saying.

Then the ambulance came and Breezy was so brave about it all. She stood at my feet in the ambulance and held my leg as they did an ECG and blood sugar tests and all sorts of other things that I was really too out of it to register. They asked me if I wanted to go to the hospital and by this time my gramma was there, my aunt had picked Breezy up to take her home and I wanted to go home too. I was feeling a bit better (ie: not really better at all but not like I was going to lose consciousness at any moment) and I wanted to make sure Breezy was okay. I was so worried that she would be emotionally traumatized because it all must have been awful for her to witness and experience. 

So, the paramedics released me and we started to drive home in my gramma's car. Almost immediately I had another 'attack'. I couldn't breathe, everything was closing in. I felt like I was disappearing. It was awful. I really thought I was dying. My gramma called 911, and the ambulance returned did another ECG, placed an IV and off to the hospital we went where I spent the next 7 hours having blood and urine tests, blood pressure tests, a cat scan of my head, multiple more ECGs as well as a saline drip to hydrate me. 

My ECG and IV wounds: 

Pretty right? haha

I went through all of that for them to tell me I had an episode of syncope (fainting) 
No sh*t Sherlock, right? 

Anyway, apparently other than this 'episode' I am the picture of health. With blood, urine, ct scan and everything else looking completely normal. So, now I must pray that it doesn't happen again AND I pray that the woman who helped me knows how very very much I appreciate her. Truly one of God's Angels set directly beside me at the moment I needed her most. I wrote the following note in hopes that somehow it would reach the angel converted into human being through this blog or my Facebook account.
On the off chance that you are reading this, I just want to say thank you. You could have been anyone else; someone in too much of a hurry, someone unconcerned with other's problems, a person too scared or unwilling to help a stranger, someone without a cell phone, someone who didn't speak English. You could have been anyone else but I believe God put you in that car next to me on Main Street in Battle Ground. I believe He removed all fear when I laid on my horn to get your attention and started sobbing with my own fear of what was happening. You could have driven away, after all the light had turned green, but you stayed to help me. I believe He blessed you with the knowledge and grace and calmness that you so graciously bestowed on me when I needed it most. Thank you from the very deepest depths of my heart for what you did without question or doubt or fear. You are the definition of the good left in humanity. You restore my faith in human empathy and sympathy. Thank you again and even if I never know your name and am never able to tell you in person I will always remember your face and how you were a hero to my daughter and me.
The rest of this week has been a bit of a roller coaster. In addition to the actual cause of the syncope being unknown I have additional anxiety of the instance happening again which makes me nervous to drive. I have found that driving with the windows down, cold air blasting and talking as I drive helps immensely. Yesterday I was actually able to drive a significantly longer distance than I had been able to the two previous days which made me feel much more confident that maybe I was getting over this 'thing'.
In an effort to do everything in my power to dissuade this kind of experience from happening again, though, I have decided to take a vitamin D supplement religiously. Low levels start around 30 and my levels at the time of my hospital visit were 5.9. So kinda low ((insert eye roll)) and I have also adapted the Primal Blueprint / Lacto paleo diet which is amazingly simple to do and leaves me feeling very satisfied. I am hoping that taking care of my body will lower my chances of anything happening again. I appreciate prayers or well wishes or any positive thoughts you may have that I can stick to my eating plan and achieve better health - and this time not just for vanity (being thinner) but true actual health. I now understand exactly what that means. 

On that note, as I have had much time to rest I found new shows on Hulu to become addicted to. 

Selfie - I love this show. It is so original and off the wall and very blatantly (if not with great exaggeration) details how vain and yet anti-social our current young generations have become. Sadly, after I became attached I learned that it is being cancelled. #WTF ABC?

Jane the Virgin - This show reminds me of the best Spanish soap operas mixed with the best American dramedies. A virgin who is accidentally artificially inseminated when she goes for her pap-smear and the following events. I love the whole premise and the fact that her baby-daddy is completely HOT and of course that her father on the show was one of my favorite telenovela actors when I used to watch Spanish soap operas on Telemundo! Ironically enough he plays an actor in Spanish soap operas on the show. Hopefully this show doesn't get the boot like Selfie. I would be so bummed.

 . . . and of course I am still in love with all my other shows and wish I could binge watch them again and again without anyone worrying that I have a problem . . . Then again, maybe I do?

Anyway, that's all my drama for now. 

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