Thursday, May 19, 2016

The Cuckoos Nest

There is literally so much to write about and so little time, energy, and even resources to write it all. First off I have 4 laptops in my home and they have all but one decided to go to the technological highway in the sky, aka blue screen hell heaven. The one that still works has a malfunctioning backlight so the screen will intermittently go completely black and I nearly burst all the blood vessels as I close the lid, wait for the damn thing to hibernate and then wake it back up, in hopes that the light decides to work. It is also missing keys in the keyboard so when I need to press the '6' button I have to consciously hit it HARD.



In other news, I have gone the way of the Wheat Free Sugar Free diet and have fallen off a few several times. In those times I have fallen off I have found just how detrimental sugar and wheat products are to my body. After several weeks on no wheat and no sugar if I consume any wheat or any significant amount of sugar I turn into a sweaty, swollen, tummy aching mess which tells me those two things are NOT GOOD FOR ME! ((Gasp)) So I have cut out things like bread, crackers, pretzels, cereals made of wheat, cookies, cakes, muffins, and all things candy, fruit juice, sugar laden junk and processed a lot of processed foods etc. What I do eat are whole foods such as fruit, veggies, meats, dairy (except for yogurt - it's just not healthy people!) corn, potatoes and rice as well as 60% or higher cacao chocolate and coffee . . . BUCKETS OF COFFEE! And when I stick to it, I feel really damn good! The swelling goes down, my PMS goes extinct, my body doesn't ache and the fatigue goes away as well.



I have been going to Curves for some time now and what can I say? I love the hell outta the fact that there are no men. Some women who look like men, but no men and most of the women are for lack of better world . . . OLD. I love that! I don't feel pressured to 'compete', I don't feel inferior to their rockin' abs or rock solid asses. (Well, there are actually some old biddies who have pretty rockin' bodies, but the fact that they're old still makes me feel better) I love that the majority of the exercises are sitting down. (Counter productive? Don't judge!) The only thing I am not a fan of is when I am doing the circuit and I am in the zone and the person in front of me forgets to move or decides to 'rest' on the machine and I have to stay on the machine I am already on and whatever I am working out feels like it might just fall off. OR when I am focused on my workout and someone wants to have a deep meaningful conversation about their life and it's like . . . I can't concentrate on YOU right now. I'm sweating blood onto the floor. GO.AWAY.



Tomorrow I am headed off to the doctor to see if I have an upper abdominal hernia. I have some of the symptoms like GERD, hardening of one side of my stomach, pain when moving the muscle associated near that hardness and some awful nausea. I am really praying it is not a hernia but also going to be relieved if it isn't something worse because I am a total hypochondriac and any pain, twitch or lump immediately brings thoughts of heart attack, cancer or some other fatal disease that will surely be my demise into my brain. I have a masochistic brain. Don't judge.



I am sure you all are following the political circus our country is currently participating in. I am seriously appalled at so many political, ethical, moral, politically correct things right now, it would take an entire novel to hash it out and I might die from the heart attack or stroke it might induce. Every time I hear a certain candidates name my blood pressure sky rockets, every time I hear the friggin' word 'bathroom' my blood boils and every time I hear about the Zika virus my anxiety kicks in. In the back of my mind I KNOW that these things should NOT affect me the way they do. I know I should not allow the unrest of the world cause me such grief that it causes me physical ailments. But dammit, if the world isn't a friggin' stressful pile of donkey dung right now . . . no insinuation toward any political party - well, maybe a little.




My girls are doing awesome in school and in life. Both have highest honors, have been student of the month and are generally just really great and well rounded kids despite (and in spite of) the absence of their sperm donor father. He is currently in Mexico, on vacation for the last 3 weeks. He speaks to the girls on occasion (when they want to talk to him) and hasn't seen them in a blue moon or five. He seriously takes the cake when it comes being a non-involved lazy sack of you-know-what dad.

On the other more positive hand the school year is winding down and with it I realize I will soon me mama to a second and third grader. When I first started this blog more than 8 years ago, I was married, Breezy wasn't even a sparkle in my naive little eye and Sass was the tiniest little bundle. In that time there have been books written, moves, trips, divorces, drug addictions, physical injuries, job loss, bankruptcies, engagements and so much more. It's hard to believe that nearly a decade has passed. Well, here's to summer and the ever continuing movement forward into the future.


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